Titanic was sinking.
An Englishman asked Santa, “How far is
land”?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
Santa: Downwards !
**********
Two days of powercut in Delhi had made
life miserable. Worst affected was
Delhi
Metro station where families of Santa &
Banta were struck for 48 hrs on
escalators.
**********
How did Santa tried to kill a bird??
He took it to the top of a building and
dropped it from there to die.
*********
Santa: I have swallowed a Kay.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I
have lost it too.
*********
Santa was drawing money from ATM.
Banta,
who was just behind him in the line
said: I’ve seen ur password. It’s ****.
Santa: U r wrong. It’s 1394.
*********
Santa falls in love with a nurse…
After much thinking, he finally writes
a
love letter to her: “I luv u sister .”
*********
Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh
goes for a walk in evening?
Banta: Very simple, because he is PM
not AM.
*********
Teacher: What should be in a book to
make it a bestseller?
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover
on the girl .
*********
A lady calls Santa for repairing door
bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I’m
coming daily since 4 days, I press the
bell but no one comes out.
*********
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband
went
to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn’t
came back yet!
Santa: Why don’t u cook something
else? .
**********
An Englishman and Santa inside the
toilet.
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip
and
do!
***********
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not
even
one customer went there. You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second
floor..
***********
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you changed your
last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and
didn’t tell me where.
************
Santa and Banta went for a drive.
Santa: Hey, look out from the window,
are the indicators working or not?
Banta puts his head out & says “Yes-No,
Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!”
************
Santa’s wife dies. He is calm, but his
wife’s lover is crying furiously…
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don’t
worry
buddy, I will marry again.
************
Why did Santa keep the door open while
bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone
might
watch him from the key hole.
************
Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming
home . The steering, dash board, gears
of car have been stolen.
After sometime he calls again: I am
coming , earlier I sat on the back
seat.
************
